The Lesson I Learned from Quistis
by beyonddefinition
Summary: One year of laughter, three years of pain, a girl marred by a small incident can finally look back and share her story with those who are willing to listen. She wants to teach a lesson, an important lesson that she learned from her friend named Quistis.


The Lesson I Learned from Quistis

Why is it that a best friend is so hard to find? No matter how much you wish and hope for one, there is never one person you can truly connect to. And when you do find someone you can attach yourself to, that person slips away. Friendship is a fragile thing and a few obstacles can break the bond you want so much to last. There is no forever in friendship; I learned my lesson when I met that special person.

It was year 2001 when I entered Balamb Academy; it was a lot different than Trabia Elementary. I no longer knew everyone, and it became a foreign place to me. I felt scared when none of my friends were in my class. As I stepped into my new classroom, I observed the different faces all around me. I recognized some of them, the ones from my elementary school who I passed by during the halls but had never said hi to. My heart calmed when I saw Rinoa and Zell. They were acquaintances, people I knew, but not yet friends.

I remembered the first time I met both of them. It was in second grade and they were both new students in my class. Zell came first from another school. We had talked a lot back then. I guess I was a little mean to him before because I remembered I had made him cry one time. But fortunately we made up and our relationship became the kind that you only greet each other down the halls. Rinoa came to my class shortly after, she was an outgoing girl and had just come from Timber. At first I hesitated to talk with her, but I did after my friend became her friend. We were little kids back then and often got mad at each other for little things. But I had gotten jealous because of her closeness with my friend, so I ignored her for the rest of second grade. When it was time to switch partners, she had asked me, but I refused. So for the rest of elementary school we had hated each other until fifth grade when things calmed a little.

And so we were here together in our sixth grade classroom, staring at each other as if nothing had happen from before. We needed each other in this unknown place.

After several periods of boring lecture about school and classroom rules, it was finally lunch. I chose to sit with Rinoa and Zell rather than my friends from elementary school. I wanted to be in a group where people longed for my presence as much as I desired theirs. So we ate in the crowded lunch area where we chose the last spot remaining, since the seventh and eighth graders had already claimed their territories. We chatted about old times and talked about our new environment. It was a happy atmosphere, and we became friends all over again.

Almost two weeks had passed since my first day in this school. I had gotten adjusted to my classroom and had known the names of everyone. The teacher, Ms. Edea was really friendly and because of the comfortable environment, I had became one of the most talkative people in the class. I enjoyed everyday at my sixth grade class, cracking lame jokes; hearing laughter arose from my comments, but most of all the feelings of acceptance and want from my classmates. I felt that this was the beginning of a great year.

So it was joy to me everyday at school. And my happiness broke the shell of shyness and I was able to laugh and talk with anyone in my class. That was how I was able to meet her.

It was during PE. We had not gotten lockers yet, so we continued to have free play. There was not much to do. The black top area could be seen with only one glance from the eye. So Rinoa, Zell, and I chose to play punch ball, the sport that had no competition and could be played without wasting any energy.

Half way through the period Mr. Cid called Rinoa and Zell to do an errand for him. So I was left alone playing a meaningless game by myself. I would've just sat down and did nothing, but not playing means the downfall of my grade in PE. Instead of submitting to my desire, I came out from behind and looked for a game to join.

It was either a heated basketball game with the boys or an untiring game of around the world. Because of my laziness, I chose the second option. So I advanced slowly in the listless game between a boy and a girl. They were Squall and Quistis; they sat in the table in front of me in Ms. Edea's class. I proceeded and asked politely if I could join their game. They agreed.

It was an awkward atmosphere playing basketball with two strangers and the silence didn't help make the situation any better. Other than occasional good jobs and nice tries we didn't talk at all. Finally I got used to the presences of the two and curiosity aroused. And I blurted my question without thinking.

"Hey Quistis, are you rich?" This had been on my mind for some time now. I wondered since the first time I saw her. It was because of her expensive glasses and exquisite clothing. She answered back, "Not really. What made you think that?"

"Nothing, I was just wondering." I was careful with my words; I knew I looked and sounded stupid and I didn't want to make it worst. I told her that Rinoa, Zell, and I were friends. Just when we were about to talk more, the period ended.

Squall and Quistis were in all my classes. I was really happy that I could talk to them more. Squall was a little shy and Quistis was more outgoing, so I talked with Quistis more. Pretty soon, I became friends with Squall, Quistis and another boy named Seifer.

All six of us, Rinoa, Zell, Squall, Seifer, Quistis, and I would always sit together at break and at lunch. We played cards and talked about the silliest things. We laughed and giggled everyday, and there wasn't one day when we weren't. Although we were all in the same class, I found myself more comfortable with Quistis.

Quistis was really talkative. So whenever we talked there were never any awkward silences. I was glad because I never liked singing or talking about the weather in between the stillness. Of course she wasn't perfect. Sometimes she said things without thinking that would hurt my feelings, but she always came up to me and apologized. I never felt loneliness around her because I felt that she wanted my friendship as much as I wanted hers. We were always together and were partners for every project in our class. Sometimes I would feel annoyed because I wanted to work with Seifer or my other friends, but I figured it would be fun to work with her. We never had any major arguments and she never got mad at me, not even the time when I promised we'd talked all night at camp, and I fell asleep. She would always laugh at my jokes and never called me stupid. She was truly a nice friend.

So sixth grade passed by as one of the best years. Although school had ended, the friendship between Quistis and me lasted through summer. We didn't go out together nor did we call each other, but I believed that our relationship was as it was during school. I was really happy when I received a call from her a day before the new school year. She asked me to eat dinner with her at a restaurant, I really wanted to, but my mom refused to let me go. So I told her I'd see her tomorrow. I couldn't wait for morning to come.

I wasn't as lucky as I was in sixth grade. I didn't know anyone in my classes, but I knew I would make new friends like I did last year. I was really surprised when I saw Quistis in my intro drama class because I remembered I heard her say that drama wasn't her thing. So we sat with each other, I knew we would have a good time. But somehow it was different. I knew we haven't talked with each other all summer, but our friendship should be the same right? No, it wasn't. I couldn't make conversations freely with her. I felt awkward silences and I had to cover it up with my fake smiles and pointless humming. But I was sure it was just an adjusting period, and we'd be back like we were before.

I was wrong. Maybe it was I, but deep down, I knew that Lisa had changed. She no longer smiled at me when I cracked my usual lame jokes. Instead she said something that opened a scar in my heart.

"Stupid."

I was really scared because I didn't want our friendship to disappear. I thought many times about what happened. Perhaps it was because I refused every time to go out with her or because I didn't talk to her enough. But whenever I made a stupid attempt to make a conversation, I was always responded with a diss. I didn't want to hear any of that anymore, so the only thing I said to her was hi.

I cried many times. I wanted to just completely ignore her and not care about her anymore, but I couldn't. Each time I thought of her, I thought of our times together in sixth grade. Maybe it was my fault, not hers. And yet, how could the little faults that I done caused her to talk to me like that? I wanted to know but I was too afraid to ask her. So I decided to try to talk to her again, and perhaps we could be friends once more. I just wanted to be happy again.

I brought up my courage and was determined to talk to her during our camping trip. We were in the same room, but she was still cold towards me as before. It wasn't until the last day when I tried again, and this time I found my answer.

It was the morning of the last day at camp. We all assembled at the cafeteria to have our breakfast. All of us sat together in the same table. When nobody talked, I decided I should make conversation. And I did.

It wasn't directed at Quistis, but to anyone at our table.

"Would eating another pancake make me look like a pig?" I asked with a smile on my face. I was answered with that same cold face.

"You are a pig." I sank back into my seat. Couldn't she have been nicer and said it'll make you fat, or at least have said that more sarcastically? When I thought she wasn't going to talk anymore, she continued.

"This camping trip is like last year's. It's not exciting at all. Like last year I partnered with Selphie and all she did was sleep the whole night, she was so boring!"

I failed. I gave up.

After what happened, I began to wonder if she ever wanted me as a friend. Maybe the only reason she worked with me on all my projects was because she thought I was a genius. She probably never wanted my friendship, and intended to just use me and throw me away. All those smiles, laughter, and attention were not from her heart, she was only pretending. She was probably laughing at my stupidity, as I believed that she was my friend. I wanted to hate her but I couldn't because last year was truly one of the happiest years in my life. I would not like to admit this, but she was the first one I liked to call my best friend.

Maybe friends were made to take advantage of. If that was the case then I was exactly like Quistis. I used my friends because I wanted happiness from them and I still hung on to them because I didn't want to be lonely. Was this friendship? I knew it wasn't. How would I know if the person I called "friend" was really my friend? I didn't but I jumped in because I wanted to be friends with her. Even though Quistis used me and didn't intend to be my friend, I never regretted being hers. I knew that being happy is enough no matter how long or short the friendship might be. Because I know that friendships don't last forever. Quistis taught me.


End file.
